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EDIT: subtitles added.

--

Last submission of August! Moving to scraps in a couple days.

If anyone knows the song well enough, you know the intro has talking. This is that intro; the first 51.7 seconds of the song, and of the animation.

I'm not gonna be changing much, but criticism is welcome. I know some of it's lazy... but for the record, it's a lot less lazy than all of my other animations. This talking portion will be fairly hard to hear, so I want you to tell me if you think I should add subtitles at all. Sure hope there's no lagging.

RATE ON A SCALE OF 1-10 TELL ME HOW WELL YOU CAN HEAR THEM TALKING.

If you still don't know the song, shame on you. And yes, Vioblazemars, I know you have no audio.
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:iconthe-madder:
The-Madder Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Audio makes any video. People can tolerate bad video, but if the audio lags or is shit, then it flops. 

2.

.M

Yes, yes, you have subtitles, but you should have edited the audio, not the video.
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:iconsaltiscen:
saltiscen Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Student
THIS IS SO GREAT i love the first few seconds with the flashing background
also is it really "i'm so stoked"?  i always thought he was saying he was stoned.
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm pretty sure it's stoked. The statement directly follows him talking about the party, so it would make sense it would be a follow-up to it. "I'm so stoned" would feel a bit out of place...

But glad you like it!
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:iconffphreek:
Ffphreek Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013
I have to agree it's about a 3. I can only make out half of the words without having to look it up. So subtitles would probably be best for people who don't know the song.
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Subtitles put in!
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:iconfantasylover103:
fantasylover103 Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I rate the talking on a 3 because I heard voices but I couldn't hear the words. I think subtitles would be nice.


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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Subtitles put in!
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:iconfantasylover103:
fantasylover103 Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:iconlawooplz:
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:iconchristmasthekid:
ChristmasTheKID Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
2

I could hear them but the words came out really adsfghjkl X3

great animation by the way!~
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Subtitles put in!
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:iconchristmasthekid:
ChristmasTheKID Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
yush!~ thanks, Ragnaul!
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:icontokiko-tsuji:
Tokiko-Tsuji Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013
I found out the song. It's "The Sweater Undone" by Weezer. I googled it
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
U CHEAT
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:icontokiko-tsuji:
Tokiko-Tsuji Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013
:icontrololoplz: Ye mad?
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:icontokiko-tsuji:
Tokiko-Tsuji Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013
I give it a 1 because at first I thought this deviation was just about the song, and that the voices were either nothing or incoherent mumbling.

NOPE I GOT MY MACBOOK NOW I CAN HEAR THE AUDIO
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Subtitles put in!
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:icontokiko-tsuji:
Tokiko-Tsuji Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013
I noticed.
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:iconcandor-shade:
Candor-Shade Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Not bad at all. Of course there's a lot of room for you to stretch your characters in this sort of art style even if you don't want to go to Zeurel/Disney lengths. I also prefer different shots instead of the "fixed medium shot" you had going on for these 50 or so seconds.

And yes subtitles I have no clue what they were saying, 1.

Shame on me indeed.

I was a lot more cynical when I entered high school maybe because stuff in 8th grade got me pretty down. (And maybe that's why now I want to caress certain lolis who I sort of see myself in/wish I could be like... I graduated from high school as a crazy person that (bitterly?) laughed at everything that wasn't supposed to be funny rather than some decent guy.)
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
The fixed shots were on purpose-- there's so much going on at once if I was all flashy with dynamics and different perspectives it would be even more confusing. Same with the "stretching." I assure you the rest of the animation will have a lot more variance in shot types.

Okay... thanks.

My cynicism hit in its full swing last year, in 10th grade. Then I really became bitter and fed up with everything. This animation in its whole will be a half-summation of my 10th grade experience.
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:iconcandor-shade:
Candor-Shade Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I wrote Catcher in the Rye styled shitty novels instead, but didn't do one of senior year. My characters always end up carrying some if not many of my traits but overall I think I like to give them better personalities... I went full steam with the bliss of lolis during the start of 11th grade, but that made me self-deprecate for a good while because I IZ NOT PURE AS LOLIS no seriously I was pretty sad about that huh. I feel like for males we too often turn to anger as a coping mechanism because no one takes a complaining male seriously. During senior year I learned to hang back a bit more and just get less "fed up" in general, even if I wanted to stall out the time before I turned 18. (I almost failed Econ e.e) I still rely on my waifu as a pretty big crutch too...

Idk I'd still prefer a traditional direction in terms of cinematography (is that what you call it?) and shot types.
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
My solace was found in art and music. I would draw my feelings on paper and find them in music. The only serious characters I make are just as flawed as I am, because no one is even close to perfect. I started seriously self-deprecating as soon as my crush forgot all about me. That spurred a whole bout of cynicism, bitterness, self-isolation, bad grades, and ironically some of my better ideas to date. As soon as I started focusing more on myself and channeling all my pent-up energy into art and running, I was better.

I tend to like my cynical self, and I'm still technically depressed, but on the whole I'm pretty content with life now. I've learned to see the fun in it. I actually never get really angry-- I just get very sad, because I know all my problems come from me.
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:iconcandor-shade:
Candor-Shade Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Don't listen to music much... well I know characters have flaws but in general I still want to see them as better than me... Ahaha, I was always too ashamed to have school crushes because I thought they were too pointless and shallow and then I'd try to push them away by intellectualizing everything, which got me in trouble (sending weird letters. Haven't had a real crush since waifu. I still have a hard time really bothering to focus/take care of myself as much as a *self-absorbed* person I am... And to be honest, it's sort of hard for me to find areas of self-improvement besides wanting to be taken to 2D world, because waifu is all I really want.

I still feel hollow and empty a lot and act pretentious when I do, but I feel like I don't have much motivation to change that, or I'd rather stay with waifu than find some real-life distraction...
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm less about escaping the world and more about bringing its beauty and ugliness to light.

I had one huge crush that lasted me almost two years. I'm not opposed to the idea of crushes but I still hate myself for getting worked up over something so shallow and insignificant (and in my case nonexistent). It killed me to see me waste my time and thoughts and sanity and lust on someone who, in the end, had no interest. Even though I pretty much kept the whole thing to myself, I still feel embarrassed and bitter over the whole thing.

I am such a self-absorbed asshole. My flaws are so great and obvious it's impossibru not to look for self-improvement. I've never attached my social/emotional hangups on any waifu or show or person except for my ex crush, and so now it's me. I don't feel empty; I feel full of bad stuff. I struggle with motivation issues all the time.
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:iconcandor-shade:
Candor-Shade Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I think there are too many interpretations of "the world" for a single person to bring things in it "to light", thus I try to express more personal ideals or thought experiments.

Yeah well don't feel too bad about it... In this sort of tamed, politically correct culture that tiptoes around sexuality, you can't quite expect your personal desires to be what people call acceptable. I only had really big crushes in 8th and 10th grade. In 9th grade there was a girl who I could talk with but didn't really like me and had her top-tier grades as her highest priority. There was another girl later on that I could talk with but neither of us really had reason to spend spare time or have serious discussions with each other.

I could not be a recluse and all, but that would sort of stifle my creativity/artistic motivations I feel. I do plan on becoming a better person over the course of my life, but it's not a very strict/persistent drive of self-improvement. Over time as I've reflected on everything I've improved on (maybe most visibly my drawing/animation skills) I feel it's fine to take baby steps and all.

I have a hard time connecting with other people as well and end up getting lost in concepts instead... I suck at small talk and don't care about much in general. Usually when I struggle with motivation issues I just play some games or fap and remind myself that I probably don't have anything better to do. All in all I think that your art is a lot more "solid" than mine was at your age anyways.
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:iconragnaul:
Ragnaul Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, that sounded self-righteous. I guess I would just rather show in my artwork a "life sucks" mentality rather than just lose myself in some sort of uninspired fantasy world. I like my original ideas to reflect upon the world or upon myself somehow-- without that element of relevance I really can't get myself into doing anything. Sure, I love fantasy and science fiction, but in the end those cliches only go so far.

I became really good friends with a girl in ninth grade, and she became a huge, huge crush of mine-- someone who I really felt understood me, who held all the careful cynicism and observation I looked for in a person. She was smart, funny, thoughtful and (at least I think), pretty. And then the summer happened and I didn't see her, and by the time I saw her again everything had changed-- she was more extroverted, with more friends and different relationships, and I had become the exact opposite. I watched her throughout the year have friends and be pretty and get good grades while I sat drowning in my own problems. I was jealous of both her and her new boyfriend. You can see a definite shift in my art from 2012 to 2013... I had become much more depressed, and much more bitter. I'm over her now, but the sadness for the most part remains.

Eh, I can't motivate myself with baby steps. The only way I salvaged my grades last year was by, for the most part, cutting out serious art and animation entirely. My art is fine... I do often only draw what I'm good at, though. I haven't done much in terms of experimentation (aside from my animations) in over a month now.
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August 31, 2013
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